tx program

well, at this point were waiting for our 7 yr old to go into a 45 day tx program. It could happen today or tommorrow, just when the bed opens up.

I cant tell you the mixed feelings im having. His counselor stated to us not to feel guilty, that the child needs services that we cannot give him, and living in our house is just so hard for him. she said dont hesitate to call the ambulance over the weekend if we need to.

well, yesterday, while i was brushing the 5 yr olds teeth, the 7 yr old came in and said that he wanted to go first. of course i said after i finish, but he didnt like this answer.

he started screaming and yelling so i had to remove him from the bathroom and lock the door while i finished cleaning up the 5 yr old. Then he started banging and throwing things at the door. and of course he had a few swear words to say. I thought he was going to break the door down.

then i put the 5 yr old in his room to get dressed, (he was naked at the time due to me cleaning him cause he wets his bed) i know, too much information...lol.

So I had to press my butt up at the bedroom door to keep the 7 yr old from coming in, again hes the banging at the door and the screaming, while im trying to dress the 5 yr old.

So there i am, im trying to dress the 5 yr old, i gotmy butt pressed up against his bedroom door to keep the seven yr old from coming in, i got the 7 yr old banging his fists and kicking the door in while screaming some fun words at me. Then i just had started laughing, thinking how riduculous this all is, that if my friends can see me now....lol.

then it hit me that i had enough, i just couldnt last the day with this suff, so called the ambulance (thank god i learned to carry the phone with me due to emergencies that may happen throughout the day).

all this because i brushed the littleguys teeth first.

then the little guy started to cry and begged for me not to send him to the hospital again. so he started screaming.

at this point, the seven yr old started pleading not to go to the hospital. I decided to cancel the ambulance since it seemed that the scare of going to the hospital calmed him down a little, and i didnt want him to go the residentail program like this.

As i had the two boys togther, the 7 yr old kept blamming his younger brother why he got mad and he wanted him to go, while the 5 yr old kept saying he wanted the 7 yr old to stay.

i start thinking, here is your older brother yelling that he wants you to go, and all you are saying is that you want him to stay.

anyway, now we are concerned that the younger brother has regressed so much, we dont know if we can handle him. He has learned so much in the 5 months since his brother has come to us.

things like "shut up, dont talk to me, you cant tell me what to do, your an a--head, your a f--a---head" God he learned quick. Plus he learned to bang on doors too.

we have no limits at our house anymore, it seems they run the household. I am hoping that once the olderchild goes for his 45 day evaluation, that we can bring back the other guy but last night we thought that maybe this is a sign that the younger one is now showing his behaviors.

we are hoping that we can get him back, but were not sure.
God this is tough.