Thursday, March 20, 2003


my 5 yr old boy has been tantruming all over the place cause he doesnt want to go to preschool. he says the kids dont like him and wont let him play, of course he is always saying "your a poo poo head" hes been saying it alot, and when hes real mad, hell call you an *******. he knows all the curse words and pending on how angry he gets, he has no problem using them. And yes, hes a charming as he could be when he wants to be.

this has been getting worse as time goes on, when he is ready for school, he cries and holds onto my leg and cries "dont go, dont go" while i am ready to go to work, ........

im not sure whats going on with him, hes therapist keep telling us to keep the routine no matter how much he cries. He can tantrum for i can relate to the problems, just more parts to the journey


our son was DX with RAD just to name a few of them......the social worker stated that alot of kids in the foster system are DX with RAD (which was the one i was worried about)

this kid has bonded to us so much. So im not really sure who DX some of these kids. plus, some of the other DX i question also, i researched all of them, and he doesnt seem to fit in the category all that much. He might have a 1 or 2 of the syptoms but then i do i.....HA HA HA

I remember when he came, everything he did i questioned if it was normal, i read tons of books on adoption, and i looked up all the signs.....(i never had bio kids) then i finally got a book on normal kid development......guess what.....his behaviors were pretty normal. He will continue with play therapy to deal with his past and stuff, but he seems like a happy 5 yr old who is just thrilled to have a forever family.

Wednesday, March 19, 2003

help please

ill try to brief, but we need help....we are adopting two brothers from two different foster care homes. A 5 and 7 yr old, as we started visititation with the 5 yr old, the 7 yr olds foster parents decided they wanted to adopt him, mind you the two children have been in foster care for two years and visitation with the two kids were really consitant. the 5 yr old has been placed with us and its been great, however, the 7 yr olds foster parents put in for their child specific homestudy, they clearly stated that if they have to adopt the 5 yr old to keep "their" 7 yr old, they dont want him, but they will take him if they have to.

I guess due to the law, they have every write to put in for their homestudy. Well, as months went on (homestudies due take a while as we know) then last week we got the call that every parent would fear, "we had to remove the 7 yr old from their foster parents because one of the other foster children was sexually abusing him. And apparently, the foster parents knew it was happening and never reported it," We did have the 7 yr old for a sleep over, and the two brothers were so great together. When we had to bring back the 7 yr old, the two kids were so upset, it took about an hour to calm them both down, the 7 yr old wanted to stay with us. It was heart wrenching.

anyway, just then we got another phone call to say their homestudy had been denied and it didnt have anything to do with what just happened, it was a seperate thing.

So yesterday was the day they were going to sit down with the 7 yr olds foster parents and tell them their homestudy was denied, they brought their lawyer.

Well, guess what, not only did they decide to appeal the denial, (i guess they have the right) but they are also placing the seven yr old back with them until the appeal is final. and yes, the foster child who abused the seven yr old, is still living there.

what the hell is wrong with this system? Is there anything we can do? We really need some help here, as the pre-adoptive home for one of the brothers, do we have any writes at all, we are getting our own lawyer now because apparently what is best for the child doesnt seem to be a concern. I guess I just need some explanation on why this would happen, has anyone else ran across this kind of problem

Both of the kids are considered special needs kids to begin with.